Regretably, strict veganism is weighing me down. It’s time to let it go.
I still hold the ideals, I’m still physically healthy (no lame supplements needed, thank you very much), and I don’t miss the experience of non-vegan food in itself. But I recognise that it creates an unwanted division between myself and others which was not the case, say, 4 and a half years ago, as a plain vegetarian. If I am seperated from others then I am not being a good influence, I am being an awkward outlier*. Indeed, this outlier status is outwardly shifting into a selfishness which I do not like at all. I still hold my vegan ideals and will continue to veganise when I can sensibly (healthily, effectively and hopefully locally), without barriers and ego getting in the way of being my best, kindest self.
I am still sticking with the vegetarianism, this is an adjustment, not a 180°. Maybe I will return to full veganism one day, but if I do so, then the transition will be a sociable one that pulls others up with me rather than pushing them away from me. I must say though, I am really not impressed by most other ‘vegans’ (nor my current self) and feel no attachment whatsoever to the word.
*: Note that it is very possible to veganise in a friendly way, baking with vegan shop-bought substitutes for example, but I am cautious of using heavily-processed ingredients and generally avoid being “fake” which has contributed to my increasingly insular way of eating.